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Editor of 'Thought & Humor'
E-mail Newspaper (Read by
up to two million weekly in
offices, dorms & homes worldwide since July 26,1997).

Tuesday

Really Corny V-Day Questions



What did the boy elephant say to
the girl elephant on Valentine's Day?

I love you a ton!

What did the boy bat say to the girl
bat on Valentine's Day?

You're fun to hang around with!



What did the boy cat say to the
girl cat on Valentine's Day?

You're purrr-fect for me!

What did the boy pickle say to
the girl pickle on Valentine's Day?

You mean a great dill to me!



What did the boy bird say to the
girl bird on Valentine's Day?

Let me call you Tweet heart!

What did the boy squirrel say to
the girl squirrel on Valentine's Day?

I'm nuts about you!



What did the girl squirrel say to
the boy squirrel on Valentine's Day?

You're nuts so bad yourself!

What did the boy rabbit say to the
girl rabbit on Valentine's Day?

Some bunny likes you!



What did the letter say to the stamp?
You send me

What did the stamp say to the envelope?
I'm stuck on you.



What do you call a very small valentine?
A valentiny!

What does a man who loves his car do on
February 14?

He gives it a Valenshine!



Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Emma.
Emma who?
Emma hoping I'll get lots of Valentine cards!

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Jimmy.
Jimmy who?
Jimmy a little kiss?

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Atlas.
Atlas who?
Atlas Valentine's Day is here!

1 Comments:

Blogger 'Thought & Humor' said...

Not Your Ordinary Day
What's really at the heart of St. Valentine's Day

by Greg Asimakoupoulos
February 10, 2006

It's a day for a card,
maybe roses and candy,
an upscale-ish dinner
with candles and brandy.

It's a day for conveying
what's deep in your heart
while holding hands walking
alone in the park.

It's a day for renewing
those wedding day vows
when, asking God's blessing,
before Him you bowed.

It's a day to remember
a Saint from the past
whose selfless devotion
beyond daily mass...

Resulted in prison
and scars on his back
as children who loved him
slipped notes through the slats.

It's a day you can ponder
you're God's Valentine.
Both chosen and cherished,
He thinks you're divine.

10:17 AM  

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* * * Four important things to KNOW: #1) For ALL (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) have sinned & fall short of the glory of God. #2) For the wages of above (see #1) are DEATH (Hell, eternal separation from God, & damnation) but the Gift (free & at no charge to you) of God (Creator, Jehovah, & Trinity) is Eternal Life (Heaven) through (in union with) Jesus Christ (God, Lord, 2nd Person of The Trinity, Messiah, Prince of Peace & Savior of the World). #3) For God so greatly loved & dearly prized the world (Americans, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Hindus, Buddhist, Asians, Presbyterians, Europeans, Baptist, Brazilians, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc.) that He even gave up His only begotten (unique) Son, that whosoever (anyone, anywhere, anytime - while still living) believes (trust in, relies on, clings to, depends completely on) Him shall have eternal (everlasting) life (heaven). #4) Jesus said: "I am THE WAY, THE TRUTH, & THE LIFE. No one (male/female - American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic, Hindu, Buddhist, Asian, Presbyterian, European, Baptist, Brazilian, Mormons, Methodist, French, etc. ) comes (arrives) to the Father (with GOD in Heaven) EXCEPT BY (through) ME (no other name). *** This wonderful loving GOD gives you the choice - - - (Rev. 3:20) {Please note that church membership, baptism, doing good things, etc. are not requirements for becoming a Christian - however they are great afterwards!!!} *** Jesus said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction (Hell, damnation, eternal punishment), and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life (Heaven, eternal happiness, forever with God), and only a few find it.


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